three.

sheesh. i don't even know how to start with this one. we've made the blog private because while we want to document exciting/special/difficult times in our life and share them with our loved ones, there are just some bad people out there and we need to protect ourselves. so, we feel so much better having it limited to the people who we know have the best intentions for us and we can be more open and free this way. :)

we have some exciting news to share but it's difficult. we have a precious little miracle due in december who is as healthy as can be!! as happy and thankful as we are, it's really difficult to share with people...it almost makes me feel naked. after levee died, the thought of going through it again was too much. and then Jesus changed our hearts and i wanted nothing more than to hold another warm baby like willow was. i didn't realize that He had already given us that gift. :) but still, we go through so many emotions. we are overjoyed and so thankful and in awe that God has chosen us as parents again but also so terribly guarded and afraid of "what if". each appointment so far to check on the little one has begun with knots in my stomach leading up to it followed by tears and tears when we see that little heartbeat. ive been the sickest ive ever been but it's just a needed reminder of this baby growing strong and healthy. it's been tough letting some "mommy/wife" duties slide while i get through this yucky time but i know it will eventually pass. i'm so thankful for the girlfriends who are in the same place as me and we can just simply send a text...."blaaaaaa, pray!" and know that you're understood. ha!

i feel like it's my first pregnancy all over again. any ache or pain instantly has me on babycenter.com asking "is this normal???" and it's funny how you forget what each month brings. i want to keep a good record of how things go because i didn't with levees pregnancy and theres things i wish i could remember. so, here we go again friends. i know levee is being a protective big brother and making sure Jesus is growing our new baby good and strong, whether it's for here with us or with him in heaven. either way, we know we will be taken care of :)







p.s. i'm not ready to share this on facebook yet. not really trying to keep it a secret, it just seems to "big" of a space to put it out just yet.



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