little sweetie. you made me a momma.
we had such a fun day today at the zoo. all three of us. you were usually more interested in balancing along the paths or picking up treasures than seeing the tigers and giraffes up close but that's what makes you so beautiful. you're you! we had so much fun climbing through (and on top of!) the big dinosaur eggs and topped off the day with a ride on the carousel (you rode the zebra) and the train.
then this evening, you crawled onto my lap with heavy eyelids and laid your head on my shoulder and instantly fell asleep. my gaze fell on a picture on the wall of me holding baby levee and the tears came. i've held 3 angels in my life. two in my arms and one just in my belly but you are the first one who's heartbeat i've felt against me. i've gotten to hear you belly laugh, kiss your boo-boo's, teach you things, color and paint with you, run and play and swing and slide with you, smell your hair, play with dollies, listen to your sweet sweet prayers...and i just have so much gratitude to Jesus for letting me be a part of this little life. and it's just the beginning of it!
you told me yesterday that "my levee, my brother is in heaven with Jesus" and then your little eyebrows furrowed and said "i can't hold my brother". you said that meadow is in heaven too. i asked if you were so excited to go there soon and you said "i'm cited! and mommy and daddy and willow and my levee and meadow!". you always refer to him as "my levee" and it just makes me long for that sweet day that our whole family is together and we can know your brother and sister like we know you.
you are such a miracle, willow.
you are such a gift to your daddy and i.
thank you for making me a momma.
thank you Jesus for making me THEIR momma!